* Busy yet sweet day *

Saturday is always busy. But I must admit, we were on top of all the things that needed to be done, my Saturday crew. Had a little drama set back, but luckily we got each other’s backs and the drama walked out the door.

At the end of the day, these cakes were only some of the orders that I completed. I enjoy making the cakes, but it’s just too bad sometimes because I can’t get to see the look on the customers face when they pick up their cake. 🙂

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* Miss You Like Crazy *

Monday is movie day for Isaac and I, well, movie night. We try to watch one every Monday, or at least will try to, since I’ll be returning to work soon (to be determined).

Anyways, we saw a filipino film titled Miss You Like Crazy starring John Lloyd Cruz and Bea Alonzo. Not so dramatic. Tries to be funny. However, the plot doesn’t flow as good as I thought it would be (or you could say.. as I expected).

Perhaps my mind flow is always with my baby girl Savana. I miss her so much, it’s making me crazy sometimes. Not as much as before. Because even the song lyrics, the chorus just makes me think of her.

Well, I am a hopeless romantic. I do enjoy a happy ending especially when the leading man shows a romantic teary emotion when he sees his leading lady.

It did, however, have a cute turning plot when Mia’s grandpa told his prediction about the two individuals.

Either way, Isaac couldn’t keep still. But that didn’t stop me from finishing the movie. At least it gave us a little bonding time together, eating popcorn and mixed nuts. Regardless of what Isaac thought about the movie, I enjoyed it. ⭐️⭐️

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*Savana*

On June 13, 2017, a part of my heart died when I was informed that my baby girls’ heartbeat had stopped. I was full term, 39 & 3 days pregnant. My due date was June 17, 2017. With an 8lb baby inside me, hearing that devastating news, I knew my heart will never fully beat the same way ever again.

It’s been three months today on the 13th. I didn’t really announce my pregnancy, my baby bumps and ultrasounds, on my social media outlets; facebook, instagram, and twitter, youtube even. However, mostly everyone that saw me (and my belly) knew of my pregnancy. With everything I’ve been through, not telling the world about Savana was a big regret of my life. So now, I think I’m ready to share my story of my sweet baby girl 🦋

She will forever be remembered & loved 💜 my sweet Savana Ancheta Monden💫

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*Forevermore*

On Aug. 17, 2017, I was happy to receive a package in the mail and having it turn out to be my “forevermore” dvd complete series.  As I opened the package, I saw Enrique Gil and Liza Soberano on the covers, it really put a smile in my heart. Just seeing Liza, pretty and humble, I can’t help but to think of my Savana. I really can feel it.  Sa iyong puso ko.  It was a beginning of a sentimental inspiration. This love story of my two new favorite filipino actors, love duo “LizQuen”.

Then on Sept. 3, 2017, after finishing the complete series, I’m so happy that Xander and Agnes finally have their “forever.” I would have written all my thoughts on each episode, however, I didn’t feel like writing/typing. It was hours of just binging on “forevermore.” But I have to admit there was a lot of anger; a lot of love and concern; there was laughter when Agnes hit Xander in the head with a cabbage (unforgettable moment) but more laughter came around when Orly entered the story as Xander’s assistant.

Well, I know for sure that this love duo has made me fall in love with my culture all over again. Perhaps because they are beautiful, I enjoy watching them, but also the love story and how they actually came to be their own love story. I can’t help it but it helps me to cope with how Savana will be. It’s weird and I hope not too scary for Liza for me to think of her as my “way into the future” baby daughter, Savana. It just makes me look forward to when I actually unite with her. I can’t help but to think of Savana when I hear the theme song of “forevermore.”

While watching it, my son Isaac even got the hang of humming the theme song. I just wanna be grateful for helping me cope with my pain of losing my baby girl Savana. Maraming salamat! 🦋💜💫

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*Hope*

Got a call from James Leavitt.  He’s one of the lawyers of Leavitt, Yamane & Soldner.  He called around 3pm.  He said his good friend Ralph (who is my good neighbor) contacted him to speak to me about what happened with Savana.  I explained the situation the best I could remember.  He said that there was a medical lawyer with him and had put me on speaker.  As I spoke of my mishap and anger with what happened to Savana, the medical lawyer explained that there’s no actual case that’ll lead them to file against what happened.  Because there’s no case of proof that Dr. Lee did anything wrong to me or within my pregnancy, there’s no way that there would be a reason to sue him for negligence.  However, Leavitt did mention to me that if I wanted to talk to other lawyers, he would help with some resources for me.

It may seem hopeless to fight after hearing what Leavitt and the medical lawyer had to say, but perhaps there could be another way of a solution to this suffering.  I just need to find out what it will be.  😐 😐

I think that’s what made me wanna go public now and share my story of Savana. To bring justice to what Dr. Lee neglected to do for me. I wrote a book of poems titled Dream. Love. Reality. Perhaps it’s about making another book titled Savana. If anyone would want to help me or take part in it, please don’t hesitate to let me know. Thank you very much 🦋💜💫💞

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*s.a.m.*

I knew I loved you before I met you.  I loved you when I found out we were going to have you.  I loved you when your daddy and I created you.  What I didn’t know was that you were going to be taken away from us so quickly.

Too quick to even hear you cry, too quick to even have a proper goodbye.  But truly didn’t want to say goodbye.  Too many asking why.

Why did this have to happen?  Why couldn’t you stay?  Why didn’t the doctor do anything to try and save you?  Why is it so hard for these pain and suffering to cease?  Why won’t these tears stop?  I understand that it’ll get better knowing and believing that our souls will unite and tether together.  :* 😘

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*Trauma*

Hubby met up with his trauma doctor regarding his bruised butt at POB III #509 at 11:30am. His name was Dr. Frank Zhou. And Barbara was there too just as she had said over the phone. She’s the workmans comp nurse aide that’ll help us with paperwork and follow up procedures if necessary.

Well, I didn’t get to go in the room because the nurse there had said that the room was a bit tight for four people including a child, my rascal son Isaac. So he and I stayed and played; and twirled and singing “the wheels on the bus go round and round” until he got tired and fell asleep in my arms.

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